I’ve been doing my daily draws for the last two weeks or so with Beverly King’s Elements of Recovery (2016). I haven’t been posting them, because of time commitments. Still, today I read a brief but beautiful post from Carla, and decided that it would be fine to just post something quick.
It felt especially relevant, as I have pulled the same card at least four times since I got this deck, and it’s one I struggle with.
The image itself makes me feel like someone being toyed with. As it’s about powerlessness, I always associate with the mouse, caught by the cat. Having had cats my whole childhood, I know how they like to catch mice, and bring them indoors to play with. The mice are terrified, often doing the ‘playing dead’ thing.
The idea of being toyed with, of being batted around at the whim of some force beyond my control, is a horrible one to me. I like to focus on what I can do, how I can feel empowered.
However, that meaning is quite different to how Bev describes the card. She rightly reminds us that there are many things we cannot control, like the laws of nature. We can’t change the past, we can’t make the future happen any faster, we can’t change other people.
And admitting that we can’t always affect things can help us towards acceptance. Given there’s a whole branch of therapy now devoted to acceptance (and commitment), I recognise the importance of this.
Today, then, I commit to acknowledging those things in my life right now which I am powerless to change. Things like what I ate yesterday. And what other people do. I will spend my meditations (I tend to do 3 or 4 mini-meditations each day) working to accept these things. And perhaps that acceptance will change what I can affect, which is my own mindset…