Last week, something someone said hit me really hard. I woke up thinking about it and feeling really angry. And, as is often the case in the early hours, I found the thoughts and feelings hard to shake. In part to distract myself, I came up with a coaching-style spread to use with any extreme emotion 🙂 The deck used this week is the Kinetic Tarot (2014), published through the GameCrafter.
1) What TRIGGERED this emotion?
2) How did you RESPOND to the trigger?
3) What was the positive INTENT behind the trigger?
4) What did you GAIN from the emotion?
5) What can you GAIN in learning from the situation?
6) What ENERGY will help you now?
7) What is the best RESPONSE to the emotion?
So, let’s take a look at what the Kinetic Tarot had to say about my fury…
1) What TRIGGERED this emotion? – Seven of Swords
Two swords lie with blades crossed on the ground, with five swords hanging over them. The background is lilac (a common tone across the whole suit of Swords), with black lines (much like the Wild Unknown Tarot).
One part of this is that I feel my words and ideas were cast aside, discarded like the two swords on the ground. Instead, this person thought they could dominate me with their thoughts and words, those five swords above pressing down on me, trying to slice me up and treating me as inconsequential.
Taking a more traditional approach to this card, which can suggest study, part of the problem is this person discounting my studies. That angers me, as I have studied a lot in both areas we were discussing, far more than the person who was trying to tell me my ideas are all wrong.
2) How did you RESPOND to the trigger? – Eight of Wands
Am I reacting hastily? When the comment was made I simply said I disagreed. It was only later that I really connected with my anger. Certainly, though, when I woke in the early hours fuming, my thoughts were darting around and I felt I needed to take action: terminate my relationship with this person. Not willing or able to do so at 2am, I instead settled for creating this spread ?
I like the calm implied by this card, the idea of taming our inner drives through meditation and mindfulness. And it’s true this person framed their comment along the lines of ‘For your own good, can’t you see how crazy you sound?’ More fool me for trying to talk about tarot to a muggle, perhaps. So, they were trying to save me from my perceived folly.
However, that just makes me feel misunderstood. This person knows I’m a trained psychotherapist, that I’ve created a tool for self-reflection that has been published by a mainstream company (how I described the Celtic Lenormand to try to make it more understandable for someone outside the cartomantic community). How about honouring the fact I’m an intelligent person with plenty of qualifications, rather than treating me like an idiot?
4) What did you GAIN from the emotion? – Ace of Swords
Hmm, well getting angry about this has helped me think about and clarify why I’m not an idiot. It’s also made me think about how to describe what I do to muggles to try to avoid misunderstandings. And perhaps reminded me that sometimes silence is the best option…
It’s been interesting to note just how emotional I got about this. And to honour that I have the right to feel this emotion, even if anger can be ugly and destructive. It is a visceral emotion, as suggested by this cup between the woman’s thighs, something primal.
I can feel this anger, use it to drive my understanding of myself and of others, without having to act on it. And perhaps I can use this experience to be more accepting when other people are in the grips of a strong emotion: be it love, hate, anger, sorrow, jealousy or pride.
6) What ENERGY will help you now? – Four of Cups
Rather than mere boredom, this card could be seen as someone reflecting on the emotions before them, rather than drinking them down (swallowing or denying them) or raising them in a toast (celebrating and focusing on them). And it also reminds me of that Ace of Cups, the full cup behind her. Acknowledging all I can learn from this situation is a way to turn from the emotion that was triggered in me.
7) What is the best RESPONSE to the emotion? – The Fool
This Fool reminds me that each new day brings new possibilities. I like her stretching figure, which tells me that reaching beyond my comfort zone, being willing to enter into new territory, is a good thing. And perhaps if I can do something new, I can introduce this other person to something new, in baby steps. I won’t change a muggle overnight, but maybe I can find a way to open them to the idea of using visual cues to help cement intention. It’s an unknown for me – how will they respond – and an unknown for them – how can a picture help you stay motivated. It would be a first step for us both…
To read journal prompts based on these cards, click here.